One thing that I realized while writing my last post is how much of my past I lived in emotional/mental chains. These are the restraints imposed upon us by society, our loved ones and ourselves. Many of these are the rules, laws and morals that govern us and make up the foundation of our life and our civilized world. I am talking about the emotional/mental chains we put on ourselves.
These chains may be fairly obvious or very subtle. I am thinking of the chains we "wear" in order to please others or should I say keep the peace? And those that we impose upon ourselves to become socially acceptable. For example I tried attending Alanon many years ago. I stopped because I knew to follow those twelve steps properly I would have to cut ties with my mother who was a co-dependent, enabling, martyred wife of an alcoholic. As I knew it would hurt her badly I chose not to hurt her that way.
I can do what I want and not have to explain myself to others unless I choose to do so. I no longer have to live up to other's expectations of me. One of the ways this shows in my life is that I am finally developing healthy boundaries and keeping them. I don't "have" to be responsible for the actions of my ex. I don't have to live my life to please others. It is nice to not have to worry about upsetting others. Of course being single does make it easier, lol.